once in a blue moon

once in a while would you hear me swear.
but WHAT THE FUCK.
TODAY WAS SUCH A SHIT DAY.

GRR.
I FOUND OUT WHY MY "FRIEND" WAS BEING REALLY NICE YESTERDAY. I THOUGHT SHE HAD CHANGED. BUT IT WAS ACTUALLY BECAUSE HER FRIEND WASN'T AT SCHOOL, SO SHE WAS ONLY USING ME TO BE HER "FRIEND".
WHAT THE FUCK.
SHE WAS PISSING ME OFF SO MUCH.
SHE WAS LIKE "OHH I TOLD THEM WHAT HAPPENED YESTERDAY."
THEM BEING PEOPLE I HATE.
AND I WAS LIKE "WHAT THE FUCK HILARY. THAT'S NOT SOMETHING YOU GO AROUND TELLING EVERYONE YOU BITCH."
AND THEN HILARY REPLIES ANNOYINGLY "WELL I WOULDN'T MIND IF THAT WAS ME."
GRR I JUST WANTED TO FULL ON PUNCH HER IN THE FACE.
THE STUPID ANNOYING SUCK UP BITCH.

AND MY STUPID MATHS TEACHER, SHE MADE A FUCKING MISTAKE ON MY REPORT, GIVING ME A D. WHICH I NEVER GOT. AND WON'T FIX IT.
SHE WAS LIKE "I DON'T THINK IT WOULD CHANGE."
AND IT'S LIKE FUCK YOU BITH. JUST FIX MY REPORT.
GRR ANOTHER PERSON I WANT TO PUNCH IN THE FACE.

AND THEN LASTLY, I WAS LOOKING FOR PEACE SO I WENT TO CG.
TO FIND GRACE HO PISSED OFF AT ME AGAIN.
SHE IGNORED ME, HIT ME WITH HER BAG AND STOMPED OUT OF HER ROOM.
APPARENTLY SHE WASN'T PISSED OFF AT ME.
BUT THEN WHY THE FUCK WOULD SHE DO THAT TO ME THEN.
GRR I HATE PEOPLE WHO TAKE OUT THEIR ANGER ON OTHER PEOPLE WHO ARE CLUELESS.
AND SHE HURT MY FEELINGS.
SHE JUST MADE MY DAY EVEN WORSE.

TO EVERYONE MENTIONED ABOVE.
THANKS FOR MAKING MY LIFE WORST THAN IT ALREADY IS.

an eventful day

yesterday was pretty good cos there was no maths, and i got to use laptops for 4 periods. :D

today was quite eventful.
before school was string power.
*BORING!
the pieces are soo easy, it's boring.
and as i was walking in, i could hear how bad it sounded- it was like out of tune. and the songs are easy and people can't play properly! i want to move orchestras!

first period was maths, but it wasn't so bad, cos we just got notes for worded simultaneous equations, and she talked to us about maths subjects in year 11 and 12.
second period was history- YAY I SAW KIM! <33
i haven't seen her for 4 days and tomorrow's going to be her last day! :(

third and fourth period was p.e.
it was badminton, so it wasn't that bad, and i played this time. :D
except next week's gonna be aerobics.
eww.
when it wasn't our turn to play, fiona, ellie and i went outside to practice, but it was windy, so we played, or we were supposed to play knockout with a soccer ball. but then ellie hogged the ball and kept going around the court shooting into netball hoops, so fiona had this idea of running leaving ellie behind by herself. i thought that was mean, but ellie didn't want to share, so i went with fiona.

fourth and fifth was english and science.
english was okay. we only listened to people's presentation and perspectives about gilbert grape and the main themes of the movie.
science.
henriques.
what can i say.
we only corrected homework questions for the whole lesson and did this flow chart thing for respiratory and the excretion system.
anyway, she was going around checking if people did their homework.
so i did the sheet but i didn't do the other bit that were questions from the computer.
so i quickly did it in class and she was like "where are the questions?" and i'm like, "i didn't write it." and she replied, "did you just scribble this quickly in class?" and i said "no, i did it before." and she pointed out "but this answer- this is what i said." and i insisted, "yeah, but i knew it before you said it." and she, being the annoying -insert word here- that she is, she said "yeah you did it in class", i replied "no." and continuously she said "yeah." and i'm like "no".
and as she was a few steps away, i said to miranda, who was sitting next to me, "oh my gosh, she thinks i did it in class." loudly so that she could hear.
and miranda didn't do her homework either, she only wrote the answers as we were going through them, and henriques was like "no this is not good, you have to write questions and answer." and miranda was like whatever.
but then as she went to check people's homework in the next row behind us, i said to miranda loudly, with an intention so that henriques can hear- "hey you know if you write the questions and answers on a separate piece of paper- it's wasting paper."
m: yeah i know, it's so stupid.
i: yeah, and they're teaching us to recycle- look our next project is recycling. she's such a hypocrite.
m: i know it's so bad. ohhh.
i: yeah i know, and then you know if you waste paper, you waste trees, and we need trees for oxygen- to breathe, and we're learning about the respiratory system.
m: yeah we're learning about it. it's so bad.
i: yeah and then if you write more- you use more sweat- using the excretory system. so you waste sweat and paper.
m: oh my gosh, i know.
i: yeah we need trees to breathe! if she makes us write questions and answers on another piece of paper, she's making us waste trees, and without trees, we won't be able to breathe, cos we need oxygen from trees, and then we die!
m: i know! this is sooo bad! it's so stupid!
and then not long after that i heard henriques said the same thing to eunice- that you need to write questions and answers on another piece of paper. then i heard henriques was like "no, it's not wasting paper." eunice must've complained that it's wasting paper. and henriques was like "no, blah blah" with like no actual answer/reason, she just went on about random things.
soon after that- the bell went. miranda said- "ohhhh it's so stupid!" i replied, "what's stupid?" and miranda said, "the teacher!" - i agreed, i said, "i know! what is this!? global warming!? i'm gonna talk to mr.carbo (this science teacher who's all about being green)".
miranda: are you really going to complain?
i: yeah, it's called justice. i'm going to stand up to what is right.

and then we all went home.
alicia came with me in my car to k-mart, to get stuff for kim, cos tomorrow's her last day. :(
we got her stuff from the $2 shop first- we got this pink bag, cos kim's favourite colour's pink, which says 'Australia' and has a picture of a koala, then, we got her a coin bank thing, a really big badge/pin that says "proud australian", a notebook and pen, 2 australian magnets, and chocolate for the farewell party tomorrow. that all costed us $12. and then we went to coles- we were originally going to get her tim-tams and doritos but then we saw this huge packet of lollipops for $1.00 and it was 1kg. so we put back all the other things and got it instead. and i got myself portwine aeroplane jelly. yum! :p
so all together was $13. but i paid for the lollipops. so now i owe alicia $5.55.
and then alicia went to the tram stop, and i walked home.



OHH AND THEN I CHECKED MY EMAIL, AND THERE WAS THIS EMAIL FROM NINENEWS- OH MY GOSH!

A woman charged with murdering her three-and-a-half-week-old son used a knife and two swords to dismember the child and ate parts of his body, including his brain, before stabbing herself in the torso and slicing her own throat, police say.

read the full story here http://news.ninemsn.com.au/world/842505/woman-accused-of-baby-murder-ate-brain?cmp=nl_news_28july2009_6&mch=newsletter

hi thur.
new layout. :D
i've been changing layouts recently, cos i haven't been satisfied.
now, i'll stick to basic. :)
argh!
weekends ending soon!
oh noes! :(
monday- school tomorrow. :(
lots of homework due next week.
all on tuesday.
geography essay, english scene analysis, science kidney dissection sheet, and catching up on maths.
and guess what, i haven't started any of them!
i so can't be bothered doing homework.
grr i hate homework. :(
i need motivation.
it's cold.
and i'm lazy.

I am bored.
I feel like talking.
I guess I'm on high.
hmm.
okay- highlight of the dayyyy.....
was probably, how at around 9ish i felt like shin ramyun.
and then not long after that, at like 9:30ish my dad was eating korean noodles.
and i didn't tell him i wanted to cook shin ram yun, i was originally going to make them at like 10ish, but then he was eating them before i got out of the study.
and i was like "whoa."
and my dad gave me some noodles.
yum. :D

secondd, i found out why grace ho was rude, ignorant, selfish, and looked like she was pssed off with me. the truth is, it's not me. it's someone else. but still, i hate people who take out anger on other people. but then i know that she's not that bad. erhm.

but bad thing- i was sitting next to this old man, and he won't frikin move- he took up all my seat space! like he bent his hand, and it kept hitting me!
argh! frikk! annoying! arghhhh!

finally, today was the last day of the evangelism, so next week's gonna be cg.
hummmmm.
i was thinking that if we ended up splitting, i won't go to cg anymore.. but i don't know.
we're not splitting yet.
and i have to play the viola.
so yeah.

oh and my friend's love life isn't going so well. like they were together last year, and then they broke up, and then they got back again, and then apparently her parents found out and made her broke up with him again. but she's only 14, and he just turned 15. like wtf, you guys, who cares about love life anyway. you've got other things you need to prioritise before love and relationships. at 15 years of age, we don't even know the meaning of 'love'.
so who cares, but i was just being nice and i said that she shouldn't worry cos i love her. :)

i've got so much homework due next week!
argh!
but i'm so lazy lah. :o

Religion

What I really hate about religion is when people insult other religions, they think only their religion is the right way, and all the other religions are "bad" and "the works of the devil." I went to church because they promised this great thing that you will find peace and happiness because God is always with you, and you have to be a Christian to go to heaven, because that was what the Bible said. So, I had people who I really loved, pass away, they weren't Christians, but I truly believed that they went to heaven, and I kept telling myself that someday I will see them again, and my whole family, the 5 of us, will live happily ever after eternally, forever in Heaven.

Talking about harsh, ignorant, non-empathic, not caring about others, Christians, or particularly Seventh-Day Adventists, believe that you don't go to heaven when you die. You wait until Christ's second coming, and those with Christ will rise first, so apparently when you die, you sleep until Christ's second coming, and then if you're a Christian, you'll go to heaven, and if you're not... then... you won't?

You see, I really want to see my family again, and the people who I loved who had passed away, weren't Christians, so if I'm a Christian, apparently I'll go to a different place than them, resulting in, I'll never see them. :( The thought makes me really sad. :( And I REALLY want to see my family again, so I just won't be a Christian then.

Listening to gospels and sermons had me thinking, and made me come up with lots of burning questions I want to know, when I ask someone, they'll be like "Do Bible study to find out."
Hence, my curiosity leads me to Bible study. Being the curious self that I am, there were lots of things I wanted to know about, that to me wasn't clear. The Christian faith relies on the Bible, because apparently God had sent his Holy Spirit to the prophets to write them in. How do we know that is the case? Is there proof to support that evidence? I once asked "So, where does the Bible come from? When was it written? And who wrote it?" and a Christian, my Bible study teacher said, "They were found in the Dead Sea, that's why they're also called Dead Sea Scrolls. It's proven to be thousands of years old." I personally don't know whether to believe this or not. Another question asked by this curious cat, is that if God loved/loves each and everyone of us equally, why is life not fair? Some people are rich, some people are poor, some people are smart, some stupid, and why is there sufferings and pain and diseases? Why is there war?

Apparently, the answer to that is because of the Satan. But, if God is the greatest, can't he beat Satan?
But it hasn't be answered by my Bible study teacher yet, the one who said that it's because of Satan is this girl, who thinks she's the best Christian and person ever.

I was listening to Michael Jackson, Man In the Mirror, this song touched my heart, it's about making a change, and bringing peace to the world. "If you want to make the world a better place, take a look at yourself, and make a change." This song is about not being a hypocrite, and if you do want to see world peace, then, start by you. As Mahatma Gandhi once said, "Be the change you want to see in the world." I remember these quotes off by heart, I remember peace quotes and inspirational quotes. So, as I was thinking and deep into making a change, Grace Ho, rudely ripped off the two earphones off my ears harshly. This had just made me angry. She was like "It's Sabbath." and I was like ... so..... what?! grrrrr.

Then every teen went upstairs to help with the little kids, and then this woman suddenly said "There is also a service downstairs with english translation for the older teens." just when I come in. ANd I was like "FRIKK I'M NOT OLD. AND WHY CAN'T I STAY HERE" so I went down. I was planning to stay down, listen to the sermon and listen to what other flaws there are. But then, no one my age was there. SO I went back upstairs. SUch an effort it was, seeing as I have a knee problem, it was hard to go up and down the stairs not as easy as 123 as some people find it, but it turns out I have just wasted my effort, energy and time. I came back in, and the woman said again "Grace, do you want to take your friend downstairs, there is English translation there for the sermon, for the older teens"
in my heart i was angry, "FRIKKKKK WOMANNNN I HAVE JUST BEEN THERE GAAAAARRRRRRRR STUPID CAN'T YOU SEE OTHER PEOPLE WHO ARE OLDER THAN ME SITTING THERE. WHY DO YOU HATE ME. FRIKKKK!"
just cos i'm tall. there's like this 17yearold who doesn't look 17, because she's short, and she gets to sit there while i, 15 years of age, don't. AASDOIHWIOEHWIO KASDASDJKLH OIEWHF TALK ABOUT DISCRIMINATION TO AVERAGE-HEIGHTED PEOPLE!

so anyway. blah blah. the sermon went on for a long time. It was meant to start at 7:30 and finish at 9. But no, the preacher chose to preach until 9:30. When I got home, it was like 10-ish, and I think everyone is asleep already.

Being an unaccepting injustice kind of person, I decided, I needed to speak out.

Many flaws found in the preachers preachings-

preacher: the bombing in Jakarta, was because of religion.
truth: NOT! IT WAS NOT BECAUSE OF RELIGION!
get it right, do your research, even i know.

preacher: michael jackson suicide with drugs.
truth: WRONG! DON'T ASSUME! IT WAS NOT PROVEN, AND HAS NOT BEEN PROVEN YET!

preacher: the buddhists worship this god who died and became a god. (and he also said something about it being the works of the devil.)
truth: WRONG! NEVER HEARD OF IT. DON'T SAY BAD THINGS ABOUT OTHER RELIGION! BUDDHISM WAS FOUND WAYYYY LONGGGGGGGGG BEFORE CHRISTIANITY, SO DON'T SAY BAD THINGS ABOUT IT!


At the end of the day, I am angry. I can't accept injustice. I can't accept how lots of people can just believe in flaws, mistakes and myths like that. I am considering to not go to church anymore, because it is pretty clear that even the preacher, the pastor, is not holy, and does not know what he is talking about, doing injustice, saying bad things about other religion.

I am confused with religion, at first, I was a Buddhist, because back where I was from, my family used to often go to temples to pray, but as I moved, we started to not go, because it was far from where I live. Then my mother's friend invited her to go to this temple of Taoism near our house, so we went there, we all believed in it, and became a vegetarian. But then something happened, which I will not post publicly, and they kept asking for money. According to them, you can go to heaven with money. I asked them "What if you're evil, like a mafia, but you're rich, can you go to heaven?" "Yes, he can pay off his sins." and i was like WHATTERRRRR SINCE WHENNN ?!?! THAT'S SO NOT FAIR! WHAT IF YOU'RE POOR!?!?
so then, we started not going there anymore.

Then for a while, I became an atheist. I didn't believe in God. Because of the unfairness, and if there was really a God, why does he let some people suffer?

Then Easter Camp this year, the speaker somehow convinced me to believe in Christianity. But now, I'm starting to lose that belief.

Religions- you only believe in them for a little while, and then you start noticing their flaws and inconsistencies, and stop believing.




SO, for the meantime, I think I'll just go with the flow and stick with my family. :)

hahaha i love alicia.
she made my day.

"mr.thomas, what time did you sleep last night?"
*everyone looking at lisha weirdly*
"what time did you sleep last night mr. thomas, you spelt mustang, mustard."
*whole class breaks into laughter*
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

okay you may be reading this and be like "....WT..?!"
but it's one of those moments where you had to be there to get it and laugh.

i'd lie

i can relate to this song. freakishly.

I'd Lie by Taylor Swift
I don't think that passenger seat
Has ever looked this good to me
He tells me about his night
And I count the colors in his eyes

He'll never fall in love he swears
As he runs his fingers through his hair
I'm laughing 'cause I hope he's wrong
And I don't think it ever crossed his mind
He tells a joke I fake a smile
That I know all his favorite songs and

I could tell you his favorite colors green
He loves to argue, born on the seventeenth
His sister's beautiful, he has his father's eyes
And if you ask me if I love him, I'd lie

He looks around the room
Innocently overlooks the truth
Shouldn't a light go on?
Doesn't he know I've had him memorized for so long?

He sees everything black and white
Never let nobody see him cry
I don't let nobody see me wishing he was mine

I could tell you his favorite colors green
He loves to argue, born on the seventeenth
His sister's beautiful, he has his father's eyes
And if you ask me if I love him, I'd lie

He stands there then walks away
My God, if I could only say
I'm holding every breathe for you

He'd never tell you but he can play guitar
I think he can see through everything but my heart
First thought when I wake up is, "My god, he's beautiful"
So I put on my make up and pray for a miracle

Yes, I could tell you his favorite colors green
He loves to argue oh and it kills me
His sisters beautiful he has his father's eyes
And if you asked me if I love him
If you ask me if I love him, I'd lie

i'd lie

I don't think that passenger seat
Has ever looked this good to me
He tells me about his night
And I count the colors in his eyes

He'll never fall in love he swears
As he runs his fingers through his hair
I'm laughing 'cause I hope he's wrong
And I don't think it ever crossed his mind
He tells a joke I fake a smile
That I know all his favorite songs and

I could tell you his favorite colors green
He loves to argue, born on the seventeenth
His sister's beautiful, he has his father's eyes
And if you ask me if I love him, I'd lie

He looks around the room
Innocently overlooks the truth
Shouldn't a light go on?
Doesn't he know I've had him memorized for so long?

He sees everything black and white
Never let nobody see him cry
I don't let nobody see me wishing he was mine

I could tell you his favorite colors green
He loves to argue, born on the seventeenth
His sister's beautiful, he has his father's eyes
And if you ask me if I love him, I'd lie

He stands there then walks away
My God, if I could only say
I'm holding every breathe for you

He'd never tell you but he can play guitar
I think he can see through everything but my heart
First thought when I wake up is, "My god, he's beautiful"
So I put on my make up and pray for a miracle

Yes, I could tell you his favorite colors green
He loves to argue oh and it kills me
His sisters beautiful he has his father's eyes
And if you asked me if I love him
If you ask me if I love him, I'd lie

there is like plenty of space in my wardrobe!
my dad and stepmum chucked out all of my clothes into the garage.
without permission from me.
and now i can't find clothes i want to wear, and ugh.
there's this white shirt i like.
i've only started wearing it recently cos i only found it, it still even had the price tag on it.
i really like it.
it fits me perfectly, and it's quite cultural and traditional, which i like.
it's got a picture of these girls playing with paper boats, and it's got the writing "perahu kertas"
it defines where i'm from and it remids me of childhood.
but my dad and stepmum packed it up with other stacks of clothes into 5 boxes.
and they're all stacked up with a height i can't reach.
and my stepmum won't help me find it.
so now here i am typing with the heater on, listening to stranger in moscow eating icecream, trying to cheer myself up.

this morning was pretty good though, although i actually needed to go to orchestra practice, cos i had to play viola for church, and i didn't know most of the songs and stuffed up, but fortunately all the others knew it, so i was covered and saved. i was planning to go home after church, but then jesslyn had to stay, so i stayed with her. if i had gotten home earlier, i probably would've been bored at home, so i guess it was good that i stayed for the evangelism. at sabbath school i also met these twins, they were pretty cool, i don't know their names though, apparently they come to the church once in a while, so i may not see them again for a long time.. :(

also there was this verse which really touched my heart (Matthew 25:40)- 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.'
so, you have to treat other people like how you would treat God.

another thing that touched my heart, was this video that was shown, it was about the Hoyt family, a father and a son in a marathon. The son suffers from cerebral palsy, yet the father still strived finishing the marathon.
please watch this video.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jKuHTz6i_YY

it shows how much a father's love is for his children.
at school, at chapel, they were also talking about fathers. and i now know how much my father loves me.

yay it's finally the weekend! :D

i have to wake up early on saturday and sunday though.
sigh.
oh well, at least, a little later than school days.

i am bored.
it is now 11:12pm

oh i just realised, this new blog layout has no space for a comment box thing.
hmm.
hold on i'll fix that in a second.
i want ice cream.
and it's the middle of winter.
i guess that's alright though.
it's better than our english teacher, just because he's from scotland, he finds winter here warm. he turned the fans on, and it's in the middle of winter.
...
freezeness.

but then i want to go to europe at winter so i can see snowing! not snow- i've seen snow, but i want to actually see the snow falling from the sky- snowing!

_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~





i take a step back and look at the world around me.
what do i see?

i love kim
from germany.

two more weeks though! and she has to go back! :(

yay friday tomorrow!

homework-
study maths and science.

7 more hours of school!
yayy!!

45 school days left till the holidays!
yay!

hummmmm
can't wait till the weekends!
but then i can't sleep in these holidays. :(

i want holidays!

i'm bored. :(
i'll write a random story later.

hi thur,
i can't sleep.
i am currently having dessert at 10 pm.
yum
i am sick.
i am not feeling well.
i'm just so tired of people.
teachers, friends in indo.
grr.
i still love my friends here though.
there's this exchange student from germany.
she's awesome. :D
still 8 weeks and 2 days left of school. :(
i want holidays!

dedicated to elsa, the froyo addict

Once upon a time, in a kingdom far far away, there lived a girl, by the name of Elsa.
Elsa is also known among the villagers as the Froyo addict, because of her obsession with frozen yogurt. She has tried all brands of frozen yogurt, although she loves them all, she keeps searching for a perfect one that's just right for her.
Elsa has tried Lite n Sassy, J.Cool, Heavenly Blush, and much much more, but is still not satisfied.

One sunny day, Elsa accidentally bumped across Sally, the rich girl whose favourite colour's green.
Sally is a unique kind of girl. She's rich, and she likes to wear stripy black clothes.
She's also known for her eccentric yet radical ponytails.
Sally's rich yet kind, she gave Elsa a sample of the frozen yogurt that Sally had just made.

First try and Elsa had fallen in love with Sally's frozen yogurt.
Elsa just can't get enough of it! She's addicted!
However, Sour Sally is expensive, hence Elsa wants to try and make frozen yogurt of her own!
Do you have any easy to make recipes?
Please send it to her! (click)

someone take my nds from me please.
it's eating my life away.
:(
i've been sleep deprived thanks to my ds.
grr!

gardening mama
haha.

i am no longer obsessed with phoenix wright..
sigh
i have to get new games.

my dad just got a new fax machine.
you can play sudoku on it!
whee! fun! fun! :D

lovelies, danke for reading my blog.
i don't want school. :(
holidays are ending soon. :(
argh!
boom
i need new songs
there are no good new songs atm!

although it's quite old, a song i like atm is 'Stranger in Moscow'
listen to it! :)

the song doesn't suit the layout.
i'll change it l8r k.

update:
i'm still obsessed with that hot celeb guy. :D

so the cure to my sickness was having a social life.
an outing + dinner to the mall with friends was all, and to top it off, meeting a hot celeb accidentally!
and standing in the same lift!

aww i'm going back tomorrow. :(
when i was sick, i was bored as so i wanted to go back quickly, but now, school starts soon. :(
i don't want to go! :(

sour sally! ;D